- Alice Wants To Throw A Party And Is Deciding Whom To Call Center
- Alice Wants To Throw A Party And Is Deciding Whom To Call Lyrics
- Alice Wants To Throw A Party And Is Deciding Whom To Call Number
Final Project - CISC 4080Part 1: You are given two sorted lists of size m and n. Give an O (log m + log n) time algorithm for computing the kth smallest element in the union of the two lists (assume no duplicate elements).
Your program should allow the user to input two lists and the value of k.Part 2: A contiguous subsequence of S is a subsequence made up of consecutive elements of S. For instance, if S is 5, 15, -30, 10, -5, 40, 10, then 15, -30, 10 is a contiguous subsequence but 5, 15, 40 is not. Give a linear time algorithm for the following task:. Input: A list of numbers, a1, a2., an. Output: The contiguous subsequence of maximum sum (a subsequence of length zero has sum zero).Your program can use the preceding sequence as input, and the answer should be 10, -5, 40, 10, with a sum of 55.Part 3: Alice wants to throw a party and is deciding whom to call. She has n people to choose from, and she has made up a list of which pairs of these people know each other.
She wants to pick as many people as possible, but they must know at least five other people. Give an efficient algorithm that takes as input the list of n people and the list of pairs who know each other and outputs the best choice of party invitees. Give the running time in terms of n.
What’s a party without guests? One of the hardest (but most important) parts of is creating the guest list. It’s a little more complicated, though, than simply making a list of everyone you’d like to celebrate with. There are people you’ll have to invite, others you really want to skip, and those who may or may not make the cut, depending on your venue’s capacity.
So how do you decide who does—and doesn’t—get an invitation to your wedding? Here are six guidelines to help you and your families figure it out. Make a preliminary list with just your partner.Before you involve your families, sit down with your partner to start the. Begin with your immediate families, then add those close family members you really want to have there. Apple external cd drive windows 10. Next, move on to your closest friends—the ones you simply can’t imagine getting married without. This probably won’t be your entire guest list, but it’s a good place to start, and should cover those must-haves your parents will be looking for. But don’t involve your families just yet—you’ll want to get this starting point ironed out first so you can make sure everyone is equally represented down the line.
Decide where you’ll cut off family invitations—and stick to it.Extended family invitations are tricky. Who even knows the difference between second cousins and first cousins, once removed, anyway? The general rule of thumb is that, if one uncle gets an invitation, all of your aunts and uncles need to get an —the same goes for cousins or second cousins, too. This isn’t much of an issue for small families, but with a large extended family, this can take up the bulk of your guest list.
Start with your closest relatives first, then work your way out until you reach a level you’re comfortable with, one that (hopefully!) leaves room for a few friends, too! Give both families the same number of extra guests.After your families have been invited, determine how many extra spots you have left and divide it evenly between both of your families. Let your parents use these seats however they’d like—and make it clear that there are no more seats available. This way your mom can invite her best friend, while your can include his business partners (you know, the same ones who invited him to their son’s wedding last year). Make the call about children.It’s entirely up to the bride and groom whether or not children are invited to the wedding. Decide whether you want little ones there or would prefer an adults-only celebration, and then put your foot down.
That means no exceptions! Not sure what counts as a “kid”? Most caterers consider children guests under 12, so you can definitely skip your cousin’s teenaged kids but still include your college bestie’s toddler—just make sure you’re applying that age rule across the board. And if someone calls to ask if they can bring their kids along, let them know what you’ve decided, and stick to your guns! Return the favor.This one’s tricky. If a friend invited you to her wedding ago, there’s no need to invite her to yours—even if you were a.
However, if you attended a wedding in the past 18 months (and especially if you or your partner was in the wedding party!), that couple should be on your guest list, as well.See more: 6. Follow modern “plus one” protocol.You’re not obligated to offer every one of your guests a “plus one” to your wedding, but if they’re in a serious relationship of any sort (dating, living together, engaged, etc.), their partner should be included. Buh-bye, “no ring, no bring” rule!
Memorable events don’t just happen. Organizing and holding an event takes planning. Whether it’s a conference, seminar or a customer appreciation day, and whether you have three weeks to plan or an entire year, your event’s success is in the details. We’ve collected 42 small business event planning tips from the experts experienced at planning for small business events.
Small Business Event Planning: What to Do First1. Decide upon your target audience before anything else. The first step — before you do anything else — should be to clearly define who your target audience is.
We cancommunicate anywhere we want as long as it has signal. For example, inIndonesia there are a lot of people working in other countries; hand phonesenable them to communicate with their family, especially for people who livingin the countryside. There are a lot of importantusages we can get from hand phone. Jurnal tentang teknologi informasi. Let’s take a look at some of its positive effects.As its primary usage, of course, it is use as a way of communication.
From this all the other decisions will fall into place. Format, content, prices, location, etc. Will all flow from the first decision.
This structured approach will also help you to stay focused on achieving specific goals. That way you are less likely to allow the scope to become too broad or watered down.2. Make a list of details — everything including lighting and public transportation, to content and refreshments. When you decide to have an event, everything matters. From program content and lighting to transportation and parking — everything counts.
And your audience will attribute everything to you andyour brand. Making a list will ensure you don’t overlook things.3. Have a clear business purpose for holding the event. Before you can begin planning a successful event, be clear on why you are doing it in the first place.
Because every decision after that should support your main goal. Is it lead generation? Is your goal to create awareness of your company or a particular product?
Do you see the main purpose as one to develop customer loyalty? Or do you simply want to make money (which is okay too)?
And make sure the team is aware of the purpose, so that you don’t have “scope creep.”4. Watch out for other industry events when scheduling. Check the calendar. Make sure you don’t schedule your event on or too close to holidays or popular vacation times. It’s just as important to check for other events that your target attendees might be going to.5.
Be flexible with changes in size, location and other details. As you get into the event planning process, you may find that your event changes in size, location, and many other ways than you originally envisioned. This is natural and perfectly fine as long as you don’t lose sight of the reason you’re doing all this work in the first place. Some flexibility is necessary. Know your limitations. We all know the goal is to throw a great live event.
To that end, we also have to be aware of what we can or cannot realistically do — be it budget or time-wise. If you decide to throw a live event in a week’s time, plan for a more intimate affair. For a big event, you should prepare several months ahead. If the budget is small, you may have to counterbalance with creativity and a lot of do-it-yourself work.7. Create SMART goals. Always start with strategy. Just like building any business, great events start with a strong, thoughtful and measurable strategy.
Live events are an amazing way to share your brand, connect with your target market, get feedback on your product (and more!). But you need to know what you are trying to achieve. Stick with SMART goals and outline what you are aiming for.
Then make sure that you proceed in line with reaching these goals.Budget: How to Pay For Your Event8. Develop a “financing plan” for your event, and estimate the numbers. Know how you are going to pay for the event. Most events are funded by sponsorships, ticket sales, internal marketing budgets — or a combination of all three. When you create your budget for the event, you’ll need to estimate how much money you can realistically raise from each area. Before you book your venue or sign any contracts, it’s a good idea to start signing sponsors first.
Or start selling advance tickets to make sure there is enough interest in your idea to fund it.9. Create an expense budget – and save money through “in-kind” sponsor donations. Events tend to cost more than the average small business owner thinks — primarily in regards to the venue and food and beverage. Remember to price out all the permits and licenses you will need as well. (This is where an event planner can help you avoid headaches.) Make a comprehensive list of all the expenses and then highlight areas where you think sponsors can play a role to offer something “in kind.” The more you work with other brands and partners to host your events, the more you can save. Consider crowdfunding as a new option to raise money for an event.
If this is your first time running events, use crowdfunding platforms to ease the risk. By publishing your events on these platforms attendees will need to pledge for tickets for the event to take place. If the minimum number of attendees required is not met the event does not take place.Marketing: Getting People to Attend11. You’ll need a DETAILED marketing plan. Create a marketing plan for the event.
The more organized you are, the more professional your event will be.12. Be tireless in your efforts or your event will fail. If you don’t want to be at your event alone then market, market, market, market and market some more.
Define good reason(s) for people to show up. What’s the draw for attendees? You need to define WHAT you’re doing at the event that will bring those target attendees in the door.
For a consumer product it might be a party with entertainment and product demos and freebies. For a business crowd it might be educational content or an exciting, well-known expert speaker. Whatever it is, don’t lose the connection with why you want this particular audience clamoring to get in.14. Lay out in writing why your target market should attend – don’t assume the benefits are obvious. When promoting an event be sure to tell your target market what they will learn, who they will meet and why they should be there.
Don’t assume your friends will tell their friends. If you are using speakers, give them advertising copy so that they can promote the event to their audiences.15. Learn how to talk to the media. Journalists are very busy and always on deadline. They don’t have time to hear a sales pitch. Let them know that the information exists and — for future stories — that you are an expert in that field. Include that information when you reach out.16.
Use Twitter hashtags and Instagram hashtags. Twitter is terrific for promoting events and for creating a sense of online community around an event. Set up a unique hashtag early on. Search Twitter first to make sure it’s not already in use. Put the hashtag right on the event website, and if you use the Tweet button for sharing on the site, work the hashtag right into the premade verbiage. When people tweet, it promotes the event automatically on Twitter. You can do something similar with Instagram for people to share photos about the event.
Use online social pre-events to promote the main event. To build interest in your event, trying holding a Google Hangout or a Twitter chat a few weeks before the main event.
Invite a few of your speakers to participate in the online social event. Give a preview of what’s to come at the main event. In other words, discuss what speakers will cover, or highlight the activities. It generates anticipation.18.
Buy advertising on social media networks. Buying advertising on social networks is often overlooked by small events. Social advertising platforms (Facebook, LinkedIn and Twitter above all) offer in depth targeting options that can significantly help to reach our target audience in our geographical location. The good news is that no large budgets are required and ticket sales can be easily measured.19. Use YouTube to promote your event. YouTube is the second search engine worldwide after Google.
Uploading videos from our previous events or interviews with our speakers/performers is a great way to convince prospective attendees to click on buy. Video provides significant visual cues thus impacting heavily on our decision making process.
With events we always feel the risk of not knowing what will happen, video eases that tension.20. Create an awesome low-budget promotional video. A little creativity with some poster board, a royalty-free music clip, and a good smartphone video camera will create a fun video to help publicize what’s to come. Get local bloggers involved. Be smart with bloggers. Involving local bloggers to participate at the event is usually a great strategy to gain audience before, during and after the event. Bloggers usually count on a wide reach and do not usually follow traditional media rules.22.
Leverage event registration platforms like Meetup. Use existing platforms. If this is your first attempt at running an event and you lack the skills to promote it, have a look at. Other than offering a suite to manage events online, Meetup is a great referrer for relevant audience in your area. It also features registration and RSVP management capabilities that are particularly handy if you are inexperienced.23. Use online registration. The easier way to scare people away is by having analog registration (faxes, bank draft or at the door only).
Offer online registration to secure as many attendees as soon as possible, that will help to forecast numbers and release budget soon.24. Get listed on sites catering to your group. Once you know who you want to attend, the next step is to put yourself in front of them. There are websites that specialize in listing events nationally (e.g. Meetup) and locally so start there and research which are the most appropriate to get listed on. Offer local partners incentives to promote you. Press releases sent to the relevant media outlets will help generate news buzz. You also could look at getting media (online and offline) involved as partners. They get exposure at your event in return for publicizing it.
If they don’t want to get involved at that level, approach them with the idea of running a competition for their readers to win tickets.26. Make it easy on your speakers to publicize to their followers. If you have any experts or speakers attending, encourage them to publicize their attendance to their social media followers. Or ask them to send out something to their email subscribers.27. Give early bird incentives. Early bird tickets at a cheaper rate are a great way to get early sign ups by giving people an incentive to act now rather than wait and forget.Team: Who Is Going to Help?28. Delegate responsibilities.
No matter the size of your business, always try to delegate responsibilities. Having one person in charge of every detail typically doesn’t work out well. Whenever possible, let people take control of the areas they most enjoy.
For example, let the foodie in your company handle the catering details. The more someone enjoys their responsibilities, the more likely they will carry them out with success.29. Follow up – and follow up again. Check in early and often.
Though no one wants to be micromanaged, make sure that employees and vendors are on track with their event duties. As long as people know you expect updates from time to time, they are less likely to become frustrated when you call or email for one.30. Sponsors are royalty – make sure they feel like it. If you have sponsors — treat them like kings. They fund your event and enable you to do it (if that’s your business model).
Be very clear before the event what they will get as sponsors.31. Always underestimate turnout, for sponsors. If you think you can get 100 attendees, base your sponsorship pitch on a lower estimate — especially if this is your first event. It’s better to give sponsors a pleasant surprise than a disappointing one.32.
Ask people what they think, and be ready for feedback good or bad. Ask for critiques. If you’ve done half a decent job, you’ll get lots of kudos. Say thanks, but then ask for the CRITIQUE and be ready for it.33.
Have a skilled social media team cover your event. Don’t forget a social media team. While not imperative for every event or industry, more and more events are focusing on harnessing the viral power of their audience. If your audience is tweeting, Facebooking and taking pictures on Instagram — you should be doing the same.
You will need a trained team to execute.34. Look for vendors who serve your niche and are willing to get involved. The best vendors you can work with are those who are familiar with small business culture. Look for vendors who work with small businesses frequently or who would get involved on a bigger level than their role.Event Day: Pulling It Off35. Set expectations carefully – then deliver. Ensure that the audience has a GREAT (not good) experience; and that you give them what they expected from attending.36. Attitude is contagious. Your guests in large part will play off your attitude and dynamics during the event.
Lead by example and have a good time.37. Let crowd reaction be your barometer. Read the audience during the event. Ask people how they are doing. If things are going great, and if they are not, you’ll know.38. Always ask yourself: How is this relevant to attendees? Make sure you are offering content that is relevant to over 80% of the audience.
The audience must walk away with tangible tactics to improve their business and career and they must feel the speaker’s energy. Speaking about your business and what you do — without offering the audience what THEY need — is a waste of time and money for all.39. As the master of ceremonies or a speaker – practice. You know your business, but do not assume that you know how to put on a presentation. Practice giving your presentation, answering questions and handling difficult and confrontational members of the audience. The more prepared you are the better.40.
Look your best. Look the part be comfortable but fashion forward. Even if you are an accountant or lawyer, choose your most distinctive suit or tie. People remember how comfortable you are in your own skin.Contingency Plan: What to Do When Things Go Wrong41.
Imagine the event, step by step, and make a 2-column list: what could go wrong in one column, and your contingency plan in the second. Be prepared for the unexpected. Maybe the sound system fails. Maybe your keynote presenter bails.
Can you cope and move on?42. Be ready to lend a hand to fill any gaps. Although planning ahead is a great formula for success, it is never enough. Something unexpected always comes up. Thus, it pays to put in a little extra elbow grease for extenuating circumstances. I’ve read a few posts here and I can actually relate.
Alice Wants To Throw A Party And Is Deciding Whom To Call Center
Finding the right venue for any corporate event was quite a task. However, a friend of mine suggested I check out the venue at Club Auto Sport in Silicon Valley, and I did. The event was held six months ago, to date everyone comments about the awesome time we had there. The venue is remarkable, the food was delicious and the staff was great, very polite. Our event was a success! Visit their website clubautosport.net/event-center/corporate-events/ (408.770.1200). I highly recommend them to anyone wanting an extraordinary twist to their corporate events!
The 42 tips sound great!I have had my own mortgage brokering business for 7 years. I do not contact my existing customers often except for sending a Christmas Card. I would like to hold an event just to say thank you.
(this I hope will trigger their thoughts and remind them I am still here to look after their ongoing financial needs and /or anyone they know looking for finance, as my business is pretty much word of mouth.Should I hold this at home/office or outside/ movies drinks? I am happy to provide food & drinks so they only need to attend with no charge.
I have never been a pushy person and believe I do not sell but provide a service, I find sometimes my customers would appreciate my contact. Do I need something besides offering food and drinks? Do i need entertainment? I would say around 90 people but believe not all will attend. I have 4 and half weeks!
Your thoughts please and any suggestions, thanks. Pola, I’d probably do an “open house.” Looks like you are in Australia, and I’m not sure if the concept of an open house event is well known there, like it is in the United States. But the idea is to send out invitations for people to come between certain hours — say 1 to 4 pm in the afternoon, or 5 to 9 pm in the evening.
Make it clear that people can come and go as they please — anytime during the stated time frame.You have a buffet of food set up (appetizers or “small plate” food) and beverages. It’s more casual than other types of events. You can hold it at the office or at home. Invite them to bring a guest if they like. That way you open it up to new people.Those types of events are casual enough that you can invite some close friends and neighbors, if you like. And invite some of your key service providers, too, if they are local.Not everyone will attend, but if you get 50% of the invitees attending, that would be great. And if some bring guests, even better.Send written invitations — and good luck!Anita.
That was a great advice, i just need some recommendation too if any can help me?my name is Happie/Enjipai from Tanzania im planning to have an event the middle of January fashion show for clothes,and my biggest target is our guests Norwegian people whom they will be arriving the whole month of January.but until now still i have not started yet though i will need some entertainment also in between the event anyone to help me what to add so that it will look awesome and of course it will be awful for me as well. Having a large event can seem like a daunting task.
I really appreciated these tips to help me figure out my next steps in planning an upcoming event. I think it may also be a good idea to hire out a professional event management team to help take off some of the stress. I liked your idea about having an online registration to secure attendees and keep an estimated number of those that will come. Thank you for sharing these great tips on event planning and management! I’ll be sure to keep them in mind. Me and my husband have always dreamed to own a pub! We are at a point in our lives that we can start putting this dream into motion.
I LOVE this website because of all the good tips for starting a successful business. I had totally forgotten that I need to make sure I know my targeted audience. I also appreciate the marketing tips! I loved how it suggests to use hashtags, and using online social media to promote and get the word out for our potential business. I just need to start looking into finding the perfect pub and keeping everything within my budget. Start by putting your ideas and vision on paper first. Then come up with your to do list from there.
Then a step list 1. Marketing toolsbiz card, biz email addressee, flyer full page,half page, or 4 to a sheet. Flyer and biz card should be color full, and explain what you offer and your starting rates example birthday packages starting at 99$ now we both know that would be something basic for 6kids maybe, but its a start.
You have to build your network so you can be a one stop shop, you need a cake making person, air inflatable company, clowns, balloon person who can make things out of ballons, a magician, everything you think would be great options for a kids party you want them on your phone so you can call for quotes and availability. Then you a mark up everybody’s price for your profit or you have a 10-20% fee. Always ask your client what there overall budget is for this party and what they are wanting. Once you know there budget you know what you can offer them, but also show them something different and tell them for a $100 more I can make this work what do you think? Well that’s enough to get you going I charge for consulting.
Before we agree to allow our adult child to move back in with us, are there some key things we ought to consider or any safeguards we need to put in place? Our thirty-year-old daughter has just completed drug rehab and we're giving careful thought to the option of letting her come back home until she gets turned around.
We want to support her in any way we can, but we've also heard some horror stories about parents who were unable to get their child to leave after things went south. Do you think there's any danger of this in our case?
What should we do?It all comes down to the nature and quality of your relationship with your daughter. Ultimately, only you and your spouse are in a position to know how much stress that relationship can bear and what it will permit you to do.The key issue here is trustworthiness. Do you trust your daughter implicitly? Or do you instead have a sense that there's a certain degree of risk involved in the arrangement you're contemplating? As parents, you're naturally inclined to give the benefit of the doubt to your own flesh and blood, but that doesn't change the fact that some people – and your adult child might be one of them – simply can't be trusted. Others can become untrustworthy in a relatively short period of time as a result of some unforeseen crisis or alteration in circumstances. In view of what you've told us, we're assuming that you have hesitations about moving ahead with your plans.
Whatever those hesitations may be, they're bound to be aggravated by the fact that your daughter is just coming out of a serious bout with drug addiction. All things considered, you're wise to be thinking about putting some safeguards in place.None of us knows what the future may hold, but for the present you can determine your daughter's trustworthiness by evaluating her behavior in terms of three simple standards of measurement: 1) Do her words match up with her actions?
2) Do her actions match up with her actions? And 3) Do her words match up with her words? In other words, have you observed a consistent pattern in both her behavior and her beliefs, or does she say one thing today and change her tune tomorrow? If you can't answer yes to each of these questions, or if you suspect that negative changes may be in the offing, it would be a good idea to take some steps to protect yourselves.Why do we say this? Because the horror stories you've heard have a real basis in fact.
It's easy to assume that you can always ask your daughter to move out if things take a turn for the worse, but if you aren't careful, and if she proves uncooperative, you could find yourselves on the wrong side of the law. In most states, a young adult who establishes residence in his or her parents' home cannot be forced to leave without due process.
That means involving the police, filling out formal eviction papers, and going to court – sometimes a long, arduous, and expensive procedure.Many parents don't realize that legal residence can be established by something as simple as receiving mail at a given address or using that address for some other formal or legal purpose – for example, putting it on a driver's license or ID card. It's best to prevent this from happening up front if you have reason to suppose that things could go seriously wrong at some point. Legally, it's far easier not to let your daughter come home at all than it is to get her out of the house in the event of a crisis. (You can, of course, procure a restraining order if she becomes so volatile or violent as to pose a serious threat to your safety or the safety of other members of the household.)What can you do to ensure that the situation doesn't get out of control?
Here's what we'd propose. Before even considering a step of this nature, take time to get in touch with your own emotions and motivations.
Make sure you aren't acting on the basis of fear, worry, or false guilt about having been 'bad parents' in the past. Ask yourselves, 'Who is most likely to benefit by the plan we're considering? Is this really in our daughter's best interests, or are we simply looking for a way to feel better about ourselves?' If you conclude that anxiety or illegitimate motives may have played a part in shaping your perspective, deal with them right away – prior to making a decision. If necessary, enlist the help of an objective third party – a trusted friend, a church elder, or a qualified professional counselor.
If you opt for counseling, ask your therapist to help you take a close look at your family system and determine whether there are any dysfunctional patterns present that may have given rise to your daughter's drug problem in the first place or that might cause further difficulties in the future.Once you've come this far, the next step is to take an objective and realistic look at your daughter. Try to see her as you would any other young woman of her age and station in life – in other words, as an adult to whom you can relate as a peer. Is she trustworthy? Is her character such that you would refuse to take her on as a renter if she weren't a blood relative? Do you get the sense that she's working hard to 'get herself turned around' and put her life back on a solid footing?
If so, it's okay to come alongside her with practical help and support until she's in a position to launch out on her own. If not, you need to be very careful that you don't end up enabling her to continue in a negligent and irresponsible lifestyle. That will only work against her in the long run.If you do decide to take your daughter in, we'd urge you to sit down with her ahead of time and draw up a written contract specifying the terms of the arrangement. Handle this as you would any other business agreement with another responsible adult. Print out a renter contract form (they're available online or through your local Division of Housing) and fill it in together in the context of a family meeting. List your house rules, making them as clear and specific as possible.
Address such topics as rent, utilities, bills, pets, cleanliness, conduct, safety, and an appropriate level of respect for your property and the property of other members of the household. State plainly that drugs, alcohol, and behaviors that violate your personal values and moral standards will not be tolerated on the premises.
You might require random drug testing and sobriety as a condition of her remaining in your home.As you go through this process, be careful not to meddle in things that aren't your business. For example, don't presume to set curfews, as if your daughter were still an adolescent.
Don't tell her what she can and cannot do when she's out of the house. Remember that she's an adult now and that your relationship with her in this instance is that of landlord to tenant. At the same time, help her understand that, as a tenant, she's obligated to abide by your rules. It's your home, after all. Your name is on the mortgage, and that means that what you say goes as long as she's under your roof.How you handle infringements of the contract is strictly up to you.
There's always room for grace and forgiveness, even between landlords and renters. But the advantage of a written agreement is that it gives you a sound legal basis for eviction in the event that violations become flagrant and persistent. If things reach such a pass, and if you feel that you simply don't have the heart to put your own flesh and blood 'out on the street,' it's perfectly acceptable to do whatever you think necessary to help your daughter find other living arrangements. You could, for instance, assist her with first and last month's rent on a cheap apartment or hotel room. You could also provide her with a small sum of money for basic necessities. If you think she's apt to react violently to your decision, ask some friends and neighbors to come over and act as witnesses when it comes time to move her out of the house. Their presence will serve as a deterrent to unseemly behavior.
Once on her own, it will be up to her to figure out a way to get her life back on track. Focus on the Family has a staff of trained family therapists available to speak with you over the phone. They can also refer you to reputable and qualified family counselors working in your area.ResourcesIf a title is currently unavailable through Focus on the Family, we encourage you to use another retailer.Articles.
There are many, many children who are shy or “slow to warm up,” meaning they are uneasy or cautious in new situations or with unfamiliar people. As babies, they didn’t like being held by just anyone; they wanted to be cuddled by only a few special, trusted people. As toddlers, they stay on the “sidelines” for a while, watching what others are doing until they feel comfortable enough to join in. They may have a difficult time with changes like a new child care provider, and protest when a relative they don’t see often offers a big hug.
Consider Your FamilyNo two children or families are alike. Thinking about the following questions can help you adapt and apply the information and strategies below to the unique needs of your child and family.How would you describe your temperament? What’s it like for you to meet new people or deal with a new situation?.How are you similar to or different from your child in this way? How do these similarities or differences impact your relationship?Temperament and Children Who Are Slow to Warm-UpEvery child is born with his own way of approaching the world, which we call “temperament.” A child’s approach to new situations and unfamiliar people is one very important temperament characteristic. The fact is that some children are naturally more comfortable in new situations and jump right in, whereas others are more cautious and need time and support from caring adults to feel safe in unfamiliar situations.
At the same time, these children are often very careful observers who learn a lot from what they see, and who may be more inclined to think through situations before they act—an important skill.Temperament is not something your child chooses, nor is it something that you created. There is not a “right” or “wrong” or “better” or “worse” temperament. But temperament is a very important factor in your child’s development because it shapes the way she experiences and reacts to the world. A child who is cautious and a child who jumps right in are likely to have very different experiences going to your annual family reunion, for example, and will need different kinds of support from you.Also, keep in mind that cultural expectations play a role in a child’s sociability as there are cultural differences around how “shyness” is valued. For example, in some cultures, shyness is seen as a positive attribute and is encouraged and expected. In others, being more assertive is more highly valued. Coping with new people and experiencesSome children seem to come out of the womb waving hello.
Others are more hesitant around people they don’t know, beginning even as young babies. As they grow, these children often prefer to play with just one or two close friends, instead of a large group.
Children who are slow to warm up often need time and support from trusted caregivers to feel comfortable interacting in new places or with new people.Remember that a child’s behavior can vary in different situations. You may find your toddler is very quiet at a friend’s birthday party but is chatty as can be with his grandparents, whom he knows well and adores.
Children who are slow to warm up are often very happy playing by themselves or just hanging out with you. Although they may need less, or different, kinds of social interactions, these children are just as happy as their more outgoing peers. Coping with changeYoung children are known for being inflexible about their routines and are generally not crazy about change. However, some children seem to have an easier time with transitions, are more flexible, and can move from one activity to another more easily than others. Children who are slow to warm up often prefer things to stay the same and are more resistant to trying something new, such as a new babysitter or even a new car seat. It’s not uncommon to hear lots of “No, No, No!s” in these situations.
Cautious kids often need time and support before they are ready to make a transition. Routines are especially important and comforting. They help children feel in control of their world. What to Expect from Birth to Three Birth to 18 MonthsBeginning at about 8–9 months of age, almost all babies are coping with separation and stranger anxiety. These are important developmental stages that most babies go through and are not the same as shyness. However, it is important to keep in mind that babies who are by nature more slow to warm up, often experience difficulty with separations and may have a harder time being soothed.Separations are a big issue at this stage because babies now:.Understand that they are their “own person,” separate from their parents.Recognize the difference between familiar people and unfamiliar people.Understand that people and things still exist even when out of their sight (object permanence).
Alice Wants To Throw A Party And Is Deciding Whom To Call Lyrics
You see that your baby understands this concept when she looks for a toy that is hidden in a toy box, or for a ball that has rolled under the couch. Babies’ ability to grasp this idea is why, at this time, they often begin protesting at bedtime, crying out when put to sleep. They now know that you are still out there somewhere after saying good night, and naturally, want to make you come back!During this period, babies who previously had separated easily may start to cry and protest more at partings (such as drop-off at child care or bedtime) than they did before.You can help reassure your baby by always saying good-bye. Give her a big hug and tell her she is in really good hands.
With a smile, let her know that she will be just fine and you will see her later. Also, be sure your baby (over one year of age) has a “lovey” or special stuffed animal/blanket to cuddle while you are away. Although tempting, avoid sneaking out when you have to leave your little one in someone else’s care. Sneaking out sends the message that you think you are doing something wrong by leaving her. This can increase any fearfulness she has about separations and being cared for by others.Even at this young age, babies differ in their approach to social situations. Some seem eager to interact with anyone they meet. They coo and babble to the person behind you in the grocery line, and crawl or run up to another mom reading books to her own children at the library.
Other babies are more cautious around new people. They don’t seem to like being held or cuddled by people they don’t know well. They cling to you, or hide behind your leg, when meeting someone new. They are slow to warm-up and need time to get adjusted to and feel comfortable with new people.It’s important to keep in mind that the goal is not to change your baby’s temperament. It is critical that he feel accepted and respected for who he is. You support your baby when you help his caregivers understand who he is and what he needs. Talk with them about your child’s temperament, how he likes to be soothed, what comforts him, and how he prefers to be held.
This information is important because it helps your child’s caregivers provide the care he needs and deserves, and makes your child feel safe with and trust them. Observe and LearnLook for patterns in your child’s behavior:.Times. Are there certain times of day that are harder for your child to make transitions? Are mornings or evenings more difficult for her? Or when she’s hungry or tired?.Places. Is your child slow to warm up in all settings, or are some more difficult to adjust to than others? For example, some children find it easier to visit another person’s home but are stressed in more busy, crowded places (the mall, a street festival, an amusement park).People.
Are there people your child is more cautious with than others? Is he more comfortable with adults or children? Every child is different. For instance, one normally shy child who clung to her parents whenever meeting a new person immediately fell in love with her new pediatrician who looked a bit like her adored grandmother.
You never can tell!.Stimulation. Some children have a tougher time joining in an activity when there is a lot of stimulation: sounds, lights, movement, and so on. A birthday party at a children’s gym—with music blasting, lots of people and activity, in bare feet and touching lots of new textures—might be very overwhelming for a cautious child. In fact, some research has found that being sensitive to textures and sounds is associated with a more fearful temperament.Respond Based on Your Best Understanding of the BehaviorFor example, if your young toddler has a difficult time separating at a babysitter’s home or at child care:.Acknowledge your child’s feelings. This lets her know that you understand her. “It is hard for you to say good-bye. You don’t like it when daddy leaves.
I understand. Saying good-bye is hard.”.Engage your child in an activity that he enjoys. For example, you might sit on the floor and begin building a block tower with your child, or read part way through a book that you can finish when you reunite. (This can be a helpful strategy in bridging the time between when you part and when you reconnect.).Invite another child or caregiver to join you in your activity to help make the transition. Once the new person has joined, tell your child that you will be leaving shortly: “I will go to work in 5 minutes.
Before I go, I will give you a big hug and kiss.”.Be sure to say good-bye. Consider creating a good-bye ritual to share with your toddler.
For example, you might give each other kisses in the palms of one another’s hands to “hold” all day long. These kinds of rituals can make separations easier.Ask a trusted caregiver to stay with your child while you leave. If your child is crying, reassure her and explain what will happen next: “I know you’re sad. You will miss me, and I will miss you. But I need to leave to go to my job. And you will stay here and do your job—learning and playing.
Miss Kathy will stay with you and take good care of you. I will come back after naptime to pick you up.”.Avoid lingering or coming back in after you’ve said your good-bye. This can be confusing to your child and make it harder for him to adapt to your absence. It sends the message that you are worried about him, which may make him think there is something to worry about. Your child picks up on your cues. If you act anxious, he is likely to feel anxious too.
If you show confidence that you know he will be fine, he is likely to feel more secure and adapt more quickly to the separation.Help Your Child Enjoy Social Interaction and Learn Social Skills Through Everyday Experiences.Make sure your child knows you love and accept her. Respect her needs, when you can. For example, if she doesn’t like being in big groups, keep her birthdays small with only a few close friends instead of that big bash with 15 kids and a magician.Avoid labels.
Telling someone who is slow to warm up to “try not to be so shy” is like saying, “Try not to be yourself.”.Look for opportunities to build your child’s self-confidence and ability to assert himself. Notice your child’s interests, successes, skills, and milestones. Make time to play together doing things your child enjoys.Provide comfortable opportunities for developing social skills.
These opportunities might include playtime with one or two other children. If your child is in child care, ask your child’s caregiver for recommendations of children who would be well matched with your child.Make time for your child to warm up to new caregivers. Your child may never be the kid who runs right into the babysitter’s arms as you are going out the door. So plan ahead and make sure you have enough time to help your child get acquainted and comfortable with the caregiver.Give notice about new people, events, and places. Let your child know that her Uncle Bob is coming to visit, her friend’s birthday is later that afternoon at the park, or she is moving to the Bluebirds room at child care next week.
Letting her know what to expect gives your child a sense of control, which can reduce her anxiety.Put what you think your child is feeling into words. “You are watching Marco build the castle with blocks. Want to see if we can join in?”.Provide regular opportunities for social interaction in your home. Getting together with family and friends gives children an opportunity to practice social skills in a familiar, safe setting.Read books about friendships. Some good books to share with babies and toddlers include the following: My Friend and I (Lisa Jahn-Clough), Big Al (Andrew Clements), Little Blue and Little Yellow (Leo Lionni), Gossie and Gertie (Olivier Dunrea), My Friends (Taro Gomi), or How Do Dinosaurs Play With Their Friends? (Jane Yolen).Knowing When to Seek Help What’s Going On With You?Tuning in to your own approach to new people and situations is important. If you share a similar temperament with your child, his approach may feel natural and not be of any concern.
But for parents who are more outgoing by nature, having a child who is slow to warm up may feel more challenging. You may wish, at times, that your child would not cry when others wanted to hold him, or that he didn’t need quite so much comforting during a joyful, (but loud), holiday dinner. You may long for the day that your child runs onto the playground and starts exploring, instead of standing at the edge watching the other children for the first 20 minutes.
Alice Wants To Throw A Party And Is Deciding Whom To Call Number
These are all normal feelings.What is important to remember is that to nurture your child’s healthy development and self-esteem, your child needs you to accept her for who she is. This means encouraging her strengths (e.g., her ability to play on her own, or to observe what’s going on around her carefully), and providing support when she needs it (visiting and exploring a new class in child care to help her feel comfortable).When you notice and appreciate how you and your child are the same, and different, you can modify the way you parent in order to meet your child’s individual needs. This helps your child feel loved, confident, important, and capable. Your sensitive parenting helps your child know and feel good about himself as he grows and learns.